I have been handling adoptions for over 30 years. I recently received a phone call from a woman who was thinking about adoption five years ago. We met with her and made the arrangements for the adoption. When the baby was born, her mother stepped in and said that she would raise the baby. At that point, the birth mom decided not to proceed with the adoption. We told her that we understood her decision and wished her well.
Five years later, I received a telephone call from the same birth mother, saying that her mother has had custody of the child for the last five years and now has brought a child support action against her, the birth mother. Furthermore, her mother has stated to the judge that her daughter was never considering adoption for the baby.
Fortunately, I had copies of the letters which I had sent to the birth mom confirming the arrangements for the adoption and confirming that she had decided not to proceed with the adoption. Those letters will demonstrate to the judge that she was, in fact, considering adoption before the baby is born to refute her mother’s contention that she was never considering adoption.
She told me that she regretted her decision. She said that her baby would have been much better off had the child been adopted by one of our families.