Dear Birthmother:

Our names are Gary and Kris, and we have been happily married for ten years. We are looking forward to adopting a baby to cherish and love for the rest of our lives. This child would always know the compassion and love you showed in giving him or her the best future possible. We admire you for making such a generous decision.

We were sad when we learned that we were unable to conceive a child. Kris was diagnosed with endometriosis, and despite surgery, we cannot conceive. We long to hold an infant in our arms, care for his/her needs, and soothe a child’s discomforts. We know that there are many ways to become a family and that adoption is the right choice for us. Our family agrees. Our parents, siblings, and many nieces and nephews are all excited about welcoming a baby into our warm, fun-loving family.

We live in the Midwest, in the same town in which we both grew up, in a tri-level, three-bedroom home with a large backyard. We share our home with Gabby, our half-Shitzu, half Cocker Spaniel. Gabby loves children and happily greets all the kids in our neighborhood when we are out for walks. Most of our immediate family lives nearby. Kris’s mom lives down the street, and her two sisters live just a few blocks away. Gary’s mom lives two miles from us. It’s a great neighborhood with many children, excellent schools, nearby parks, and a busy community center.

Playing with Gabby in our backyard.

Gary: I was born and raised in the Midwest, the youngest of three children. My father died when I was young, and my mother did a phenomenal job of raising my brother, my sister, and me. While she worked full-time to support us, she was a continuous presence in all of our lives. She is loving, caring, and helpful to everyone around her. When I needed someone to lean on — not an easy thing for a teenage boy to admit — she was there to love and support me. She always emphasized the importance of education, and made sure that my homework was done before I could go out to play. I was responsible for a share of the household chores. She encouraged me to learn to do things for myself so I would grow to be a competent, independent adult. She still lives in the house in which I grew up, just a few miles from where Kris and I live.

When I was young, all the neighbors would gather for block parties. We’d play ball in the neighborhood, and go in and out of each other’s houses. I am still in touch with many of my childhood friends.

Gary: I learned to love camping while on family trips each summer.

My mom taught me the importance of making a commitment, and keeping it. When I was a young kid, I begged to join a summer baseball team. She warned me that it would be a lot of work, with long hours of practice. I insisted, and she signed me up. After a few weeks, I was tired of the seemingly endless practices, standing in the outfield hoping for a ball, or waiting forever for my turn at bat. I would look longingly at the kids who were playing on the swings and slides near the baseball field. I wanted the freedom to play what I wanted, when I wanted. I told my mom I was quitting the team. She looked me right in the eye and said, “Okay. You can make your own decision.” Then she proceeded to remind me that I had made a promise to the other players on the team, and that I would be letting all of them down if I quit. I stayed on the team. In fact, I grew to love baseball so much, that I played every summer through high school. My mom taught me an important lesson: not to give up and keep your word.

We would often go camping during the summers. My mom, brother Greg, and sister Carla would spend long, lazy days in the woods, enjoying our freedom, and each other’s company. Greg and Carla weren’t just my playmates. They helped to raise me and served as great role models for me. Greg, in particular, helped me through the ups and downs of boyhood. In many ways, he filled the hole in my life created by my father’s death.

In addition to my immediate family, I was very close with my grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins. My grandpa often took me fishing and to the park to play football or baseball. We spent many Sunday afternoons at his house, watching the Cubs on television. My uncles supported my mom in any way they could — and were instrumental in instilling a strong work ethic in me. They were wonderful mentors, as well as loving uncles. Having a family to count on, knowing you are always loved, is essential to a happy childhood. I had that — and still do. I am eager to raise a child with the same love and support that I had. Our extended family will be there for our child, just as they were for me.

On the trail with Kris: Our 10 years of marriage have been the best of my life.

I am a radiation therapist at an outpatient cancer clinic. I know that that sounds like it could be grim, but I love my work. I see my patients for six to seven weeks at a time, and we really make a connection during their treatment. They aren’t just patients; they are people with whom I develop a meaningful relationship. I treat others as I would like to be treated, making an effort to make people feel comfortable, often in difficult situations. I think of myself as relaxed and easy going, and I hope that others find me fun and kind. I have regular hours, 8:00 a.m. until 4:00 p.m., Monday through Friday. I will be able to be at home with the baby late in the afternoons, and we’ll all have our weekends together.

In high school, I played football, baseball, and wrestled. I was a good student, but I really liked sports more than academics. I went to college in the Midwest, and got an associate’s degree in business management. After more than a decade in the business world, I went back to school for a degree in radiation therapy. It was the best decision I’ve made — except for marrying Kris.

Kris and I met in high school. What attracted me to her was her warmth and generosity with others. Besides, we had a lot in common, and really had fun when we were together. We still do. We have been married for ten years, and it has been the best 10 years of my life. Kris is responsible, hard-working, and organized. She loves children, and is never happier than when she is surrounded by our extended family. She loves to take our nieces and nephews school shopping every fall. She never misses a dance recital or science fair at their schools. Every Halloween, she helps make their costumes and takes them trick or treating. Kris’s greatest attribute is her compassion. She is the first to help others. No one is a better caregiver than Kris. She is generous with her affection, her time, and her words. A day doesn’t go by without her talking to her mother. And she never goes to sleep without telling me she loves me. She will be a wonderful mother. She has such a big heart, and so much love to share.

Family comes first with me. Kris and I have always talked about having children. We spend a lot of time with our nieces and nephews, having them over to spend the night, going to their school performances and athletic events, celebrating birthdays and holidays with them. We love having them in our lives. But long for a child to call us “Mom and Dad”. A child to encourage and support, laugh with and comfort, ride bikes with, read to, and wait up for during his or her teenage years. We want to raise our son or daughter as we were raised, learning how to walk in the world by watching those who love him or her.

Kris: I am the youngest child in my family, too. I have two older sisters, Kathy and Laurie. Kathy was a mentor to me. She helped me with my homework and she babysat for me when my parents went out. Linda kept me on my toes. If she played basketball, I played basketball. And it was the same with all our other activities. Anything she could do, I thought I could do — and better. Now, we’re all three the closest of sisters and the best of friends. We live within blocks of each other and see each other frequently.

While I was growing up, my dad worked as the operations manager for a chain of banks. My mom didn’t work outside the home until I was a junior in high school. My mom was the nurturer in the family. She was our greatest source of daily advice on social issues, as well as school work. My dad counseled us on the bigger decisions, like where to go to college and what career might interest us. They both taught us the importance of a strong work ethic, the value of a good education, and the centrality of family.

Our extended family would get together on holidays. There would be about 40 of us, filling the house with chatter and laughter. We went on many family vacations, often including aunts, uncles, and cousins. My sisters and I often brought friends along, too. The vacations were never fancy, but they were always full of family and fun.

We live in a warm and family-friendly community – the same place where we grew up.

One of my best childhood memories is of a warm, late spring night, near the end of the school year. I was already itching for summer. I wanted to be outside, playing, not inside doing my homework and going to bed early to be ready for school in the morning. My dad must have read my mind. My mom was out with friends, and he was as eager to enjoy the evening as I was. We put on our shoes, got on our bikes, and went to the park. We raced up and down the streets, and played at the park until after dark. I was covered in dirt when we got back home — and I’d never been happier. I hurried into the shower, rushed through my school work, and fell asleep immediately. It’s important to stop sometimes, enjoy a perfect moment, and then return to work and the daily routine. I still smile when I think of that wonderful evening of spontaneity and sheer joy.

I was a good student. My parents always encouraged us to strive for good grades. I went to college and studied pharmacy. After completing my degree, I began working for a pharmacy chain, where I have had many opportunities for advancement. I am now the pharmacy district manager, a job that includes mentoring fellow pharmacists and helping them advance in their careers. I have very flexible work hours, and I never have to work weekends. While I am at work, Gary and my mother will help care for our child. Of course, Gary’s mom and my sisters are also clamoring for the chance to take care of the baby. In fact, our entire family is just waiting for another baby to love and care for.

Gary and I met in high school, but we didn’t marry until we both completed our degrees and had worked for a number of years. We went to different universities, and those years apart were an excellent test of our relationship. We both had the opportunity to learn to be independent and to appreciate the depth of our relationship. We also learned the importance of communication, loyalty, patience, and trust.

Gary has an amazing ability to make people relax in the most stressful of situations. He is patient and caring. He is reliable and resourceful. He is a magnet for kids and teenagers. I love watching him playing baseball or football with the kids in our family. They know that he’s just a big kid himself. (Our teenage nieces refuse to go to a funny movie with him, though. They say his loud laughter is just toooo embarrassing.) He’s also the first person our nieces and nephews call when they need help. Recently, our fifteen year old niece called in the middle of the night. She was at a party that had gotten rowdy, and the police had been called. She needed a ride home. Gary and I rushed to get her. She didn’t like hearing Gary’s lecture during the car ride home, but she knew we would always be there for her.

Gary’s always been there for me, too. When I was in college, my father became ill, and I decided to move back home and commute two hours to my college classes every day. Gary bought me a cell phone so I could call from the road, if necessary. And on exam days, he drove me to and from school so I could study during the commute. More recently, when my father died, Gary was by my side through it all. And he’s been wonderful to my mom, too, helping her with financial decisions and household projects.

Gary and Kris: We both like to bike, watch movies together, go to sporting events, and play board and card games. Kris likes to read and exercise. Gary likes to play golf and enjoys any excuse to be outdoors.

We go to church every week, with Kris’s mom and her sisters’ families. Faith is an important part of our lives.

We love to relax on our front porch and chat with our neighbors.

Holidays are family time. We get together with our whole family: children are running around, playing, the men are watching sports, and the women are talking and laughing about …everything. We especially love Christmas Eve, when Santa comes to visit the family crowd. We sing carols and pass out gifts. It’s loud. It’s hectic. And we wouldn’t trade it for anything. We often imagine adding a child to this wonderful mix. It would complete the gatherings.

We love to travel. We try to discover a new place every year, but we can’t resist returning to some of our favorite spots. We like to hike. You struggle along the trail, wondering if the effort is worth it, and then….the wooded area opens up to a beautiful sparkling waterfall. We can’t wait to share our love of the outdoors with a child.

We long for a child to fill our lives and our hearts. We will always appreciate this most precious gift from you. And we will raise your child to understand and appreciate your unselfish, loving decision. We want to provide you with any information you need to make an informed choice for your baby. Likewise, we would be happy to send you letters and photographs letting you know how your child is getting along, if you wish.

If you would like to know more about us, you can call us directly at 1- 800-503-1997. Or, if you prefer, you can contact our attorneys, Steve and Joel Kirsh, at 1-800-333-5736. If you contact them after business hours, they will be paged and will call you back as soon as possible. Your telephone call is not an obligation of any sort. We will not attempt to influence you in any way.

Thank you for considering us,

Gary and Kris